and they were roommates,

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FROM THIS THREAD.

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[ WOW I SURE WISH I KNEW !!!!!!! aims dart ]

October 1. So you're right at the end of summer and I'm at the beginning of fall. Anything you want for your birthday?

[selfconcept]

Nothing in particular right now. I haven't thought about it... and I don't really need many things that I don't have, if at all.

[ Hien is difficult to buy for, supposedly. ]

I just want a good day.

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[ even if by then they've broken up, as hien's underclassman and friend he wants to deliver on that promise anyway. ]

A good day - got it. I'll make Hien Day a success.

[ look forward to it! ]

[selfconcept]

[ "Hien Day"... The mere concept of it makes him smile a little. Is this how it feels to be special to someone? Maybe so. He's trying to keep himself from being too over his own head though. It's that forced independence again. ]

It won't take much. You know how I am.

[ Naps all day. ]

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[ there’s their orders being called out. he flashes hien a grin as he stands to retrieve their dinner. ]

I do - and by then I’ll know lots more about you. So you’ll get your good day and if you can spend it smiling just like that, it’ll be a good day for me too. Be right back. Oh - and you’ll still get a gift, of course.

[ off he goes. ]

[selfconcept]

[ Hien's about to say that he doesn't really need a gift, but Haiga is off to collect their dinner. Hien goes to nab a table and makes sure that Haiga will know where he is by waving if Haiga looks his way. Simple. Foolproof.

Now that he's actually thinking about it, celebrating his birthday feels a little strange to him. Especially with the idea of celebrating it someone else. It feels so personal, like he deserves to be celebrated for his existence.

...

Another thing that he'll have to get used to, he supposes. He sits around the table he chooses and waits for Haiga. ]

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Hehe, dinner get!

[ and it’s thanks to his job that he handles the two trays with ease. he sets hien’s down first, then his own and slides into the free seat. hien’s bowl looks dangerous, like a promised date with the toilet. ]

Let’s eat.

[ but of course he’s distracted watching hien take the first bite with fascination and a tiny bit of horror. ]

[selfconcept]

[ Hien nods to Haiga in thanks for bringing the food. He claps his hands together once, mumbling a thanks for the good before taking a spoon to sample the ramen's soup first. It's so vibrantly and violently red, yet Hien sips it without a care.

He proceeds to eat the ramen normally after that. Hien makes it look like it's nothing. ]

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[ well damn. ]

Senpai... Aren't you crazy impressive?

[ he hasn't called hien that since the first day, but. this warrants it. ]

[selfconcept]

[ Hien isn't too far out there to not realize that this could be an amazing feat, but he shakes his head. ]

It's just being more tolerant of spicy food. My mouth and all around it might turn red for a bit, but I like it... not to the point that it overpowers the original flavor though. Then there's no point.

[ He says that but he still likes it super spicy anyway. Sounds like he can still taste the original flavor regardless. ]

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Red lips…

[ wait no he’s not gonna imagine it. (too late…) divert and turn your mind away from temptation, haiga. ]

Do you just like bold flavors, Hien?

[selfconcept]

[ Hien didn't even mean to, but he wwtches Haiga with some amusement. ]

I do, but there's something nice about subtle flavors too, like in soups.

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[ ‘are you teasing me?’ he doesn’t ask.

which one is he? full-bodied and subtle? or bold like a punch? they’re talking about food and he doesn’t think 100% that hien is teasing him (maybe? though he looks amused), but he can’t help but want to be all the things hien likes.

even if, at the end, he can only be himself. plain. what you see is what you get. ]

I like… simple and comforting. Mom’s cooking, grandma’s cooking - that kinda thing.

[selfconcept]

It's like the feeling of being aware that it's their cooking in a single bite, right?

[ Because of the comfort. ]

I think that sort of sense would be comforting if you felt safe with them.

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Yeah, you get it. My mom’s beef stew is definitely on the saltier side, but it’s Mom’s so…

[ it’s the best. hien’s right in that he would recognize it from first bite. ]

Hopefully you’ll get to try it some day. That is… uh, if you want to meet my family? I’m want to tell them about you - and us.

[selfconcept]

[ Hien quietly slurp some more noodles, taking his time to think about that question. Introduction to family. Family.

... ]

Already? We just started dating today.

[ His usual expression betrays the anxiety he feels deep down. He doesn't think he's good enough for anyone to judge him. Bottom of the barrel. Useless.

He grabs the bowl and chugs the soup. ]

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[ almost choking on his own food, eyes going wide. ]

N-no, not immediately or anything! It'll be a while - probably. If... when... you figure out I'm the right guy for you.

[ and to an extent, haiga needs to figure out the same. ]

It's just... if that happens, whenever that is, I'd like to tell them. Honestly... the ball is in your court on that one. If you decide no, then... that's that.

[selfconcept]

Tell me that sort of thing when you think it's time.

[ Not when they just started dating. There's a rather rancid feeling in his gut, but he powers through it, ignoring it with the power of spiciness and heat. ]

I don't like thinking that far into the future.

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[ haiga, who comes from a pretty good natured and easygoing family, tilts his head and frowns with worry. to him hien is great, so of course his family will like him - though he doesn’t know how they’ll take the boyfriend thing, but he loves his family and they love him.

he can read hien’s face enough to know something’s wrong and - ah, what should he say? ]

Okay. [ he leans forward over his bowl, concern drawing him closer. ] I… Sorry, are you alright?

[selfconcept]

[ Hien puts his bowl down after chugging the soup. It's empty. ]

... I'm fine. It's not your fault.

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…

[ saying it’s not his fault means haiga was right and something is wrong. or was wrong. maybe hien’s already over it, maybe not. he won’t try to push or anything, but haiga’s always found comfort in words and touch. it’s also the way he offers comfort.

though… probably best if he stops putting his foot in his mouth. ugh.

anyway.

his leg extends enough so their ankles brush under the table and he keeps it there. sorry for what i said. ]

Don’t pull away, please?

[selfconcept]

[ Hien was about to pull his foot back until Haiga says that and he keeps his foot there. He'll never get used to it being a form of comfort, since he's always associated feet touching under the table as something he's not supposed to do.

On the outside, he's the same as ever. ]

... It's just something personal, so don't worry about it.

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Right, but… my feelings are my own responsibility, you know?

[ including when he’s worried, or anxious, or disappointed. saying ‘don’t worry’ isn’t a magic spell that’ll make it happen, though that would be nice. ]

I am worried, but - I want to be. You’re not making me or anything. And I know your feelings are yours.

[ he gives it a moment more, then pulls his leg back and starts stacking his utensils on top of his bowl for clean up. ]

Um, so don’t worry if I’m worried. You know I overthink.

[selfconcept]

And you know I don't think much in comparison.

[ He also starts putting things inside his empty bowl. ]

... Family is a bit of a sore spot for me, but it's not like I'll forbid us from talking about it at all.

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[ he likes that about hien actually… ]

But you could ban the subject. [ even as his face says he wants to know. ] And maybe you should? Or we should, I guess?

[ he stands and picks up his own tray. ]

It doesn’t have to be forever.